you know, i like to think that you and me can talk about anything, because we usually do.
today – condoms.
one of my clients has bowls of these lying in their ladies bathrooms. i would have preferred mints (sealed in individual wrappers, of course) but this is good too.
hoorah, it’s the female condom.
check out the packaging, it says:
‘Use with every Sex Act’ which is closely followed by ‘One Time Use Only’ – hmmm not the clearest of instructions.
i’m assuming they have the boy version in the boy’s toilets.
so curious as to how it works, i googled images for ‘female condom’, wondering what mr and mrs google had to show on the subject.
this is it:
small hint: chick, you should be nekkid. dude, you don’t use your finger.
here are the educational drawrings on the back of the pack. the official ‘how to’ if you will:
step one: open packet. (not sure how else you’d get in there.)
step two: dye your hands purple.
step three: do that thing that they show you above.
step four: all three of you insert the condom. don’t know how this suddenly became a menage a trois with no men involved. after all the trouble these ladies have gone to, the condom may not even be necesary.
steps five and six: were quite graphic in a diagramatic, line-drawing kind of way, so i thought i’d spare your eyeballs.
step seven: the end result, sort of self explanatory.
step eight: penis in. oh baby, oh baby, oh baby, oh baby. etcetera, etcetera.