the devil's dictionary – 'K' is for…

if you’ve been driving around woodstock getting blowjobs from toothless hookers for the last couple of months, and you’ve therefore missed all the posts here about ambrose bierce and his devil’s dictionary (circa 1881), then please proceed directly to your nearest clinic and get tested for any number of venereal diseases. then once that’s sorted and you’ve picked up your anti-biotics, please click here and check out the story behind my good friend ambrose bierce.

ah ambrose, ambrose, ambrose. my only consolation at never having had the opportunity to ‘get to know you a little better’ in all your brilliant geniusness, is that you lived in a time of wenches and corsets and probably got a lot of leg over anyway.

herewith the ‘k’s’. they are few, but not so far between. (purple bits directly transcribed)

Kill, vt. To create a vacancy without nominating a successor.

King, n. A male person commonly known in America as a ‘crowned head,’ although he never wears a crown and has usually no head to speak of.

Kleptomaniac, n. A rich thief.

clever chap. although nobody told him it’s no longer movember. he could probably ditch the mo.

see pointy men’s shoes were ‘in’ back then too.

he likes to throw in a little ‘blue steel’ in all his photos/portraits, don’t you think? although back then it was more like the sepia steel.

see you soon for the ‘L’s’, ambrose. mwah, mwah.

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