in this movember month of moustaches, nobody rocks that mo better than ambrose bierce.
see i wasn’t lying. rocking mo dude.
for those of you who have been stuck in polsmoor for the last 2 – 5, with group showers and without internet access, ambrose was around in 1817 when he wrote ‘the devil’s dictionary’. we’re at the ‘i’s’ already. sorry but the world doesn’t come to a halt just cos you got bust for drug trafficking!
in case you missed them here are the A’s, B’s, C’s, D’s, E’s, Ef’s, G’s and more recently the H’s.
so we’re onto the i’s, the only dirty words i can think of starting with an ‘i’ are…
nope i’ve got nothing for you… um igloo, hardly a dirty word… iiiii… nope still nothing. let’s see what mr bierce can do:
I, pron – I is the first letter of the alphabet, the first word of the language, the first thought of the mind, the first object of affection. the plural is said to be We, but how can there be more than one myself?
Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. The idiot’s activity is not confined to any special field of thought or action, but pervades and regulates the whole. He has the last word in everything.
Idleness, n. A model farm where the devil experiments with seeds of new sins and promotes the growth of staple vices.
Imagination, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
Imbecility, n. A kind of divine inspiration or sacred fire affecting censorious critics of this dictionary.
Immigrant, n. An unenlightened person who thinks one country better than another.
Indiscretion, n. The guilt of woman.
Influence, n. In politics, a visionary quo given in exhange for a substantial quid.
Ink, n. The properties of ink are peculiar and contradictory: it may be used to make reputations and unmake them.
Interpreter, n. One who enables two persons of different languages to understand each other by repeating to each what it would have been to the interpreter’s advantage for the other to have said.
Inventor, n. A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization.
Irreligion, n. The princial one of the great faiths of the world.
well done ambrose, i still can’t think of any decent dirty words starting with ‘i’ . maybe if i had a moustache like yours i would be smarter.
1 thought on “the devil's dictionary – 'i' is for…”
Oh gawd no! Please don’t grow a moustache… You’re just fine the way you are 😉