there’s a reason i don’t date 28 year olds. besides the fact that at 35 i’m too old for them, and the thought of it makes me feel so dirty i want to take two showers in a row. the other reason is that i think men and women are already on a completely different plane from each other, but younger men are on such a different plane that it’s not even a plane, it’s more like a skateboard.
but for some reason over the last couple of weeks i’ve had two youths of 28 approach me out of the blue on the dating website. which is strange because i’m quite specific in my profile, i’m only interested in men/boys between the ages of 35 and 46.
this is how things played out with the first 28 year old:
28 year old’s profile: blonde, blue eyes, 5 foot 8, aquarius, born and bred capetonian.
EMAILS:
28 YEAR OLD: Hey, I really like your profile, would you maybe like to chat?
ME: sure we can chat. but aren’t i too old for you? shouldn’t you be running around after 25 year olds?
28 YEAR OLD: no why? i like older woman…if the age is a problem, just tell me.
ME: the age is a problem.
ME: sure we can chat. but aren’t i too old for you? shouldn’t you be running around after 25 year olds?
28 YEAR OLD: no why? i like older woman…if the age is a problem, just tell me.
ME: the age is a problem.
28 YEAR OLD: ok, well then can we just email a bit then?
(a handful of emails of chatty and informative tone go here. i’ll paraphrase for you: i’m a copywriter, he’s in IT, he likes rugby, i like shoes, he likes older women, i like older men… you get the picture.)
we email like this for two days, at which point he cons me into handing over my cell number so he can call me to convince me how mature he is and that we should go on a date. i give him my number against my better judgement. partly because i’m curious, and partly because i sense it might ultimately make a good blog post.
and so we sms. five times in total.
he smses:
hey grgus? wen can i c u?
i sms:
i don’t know, what time does school get out?
he smses:
i tld u, me in IT nt skl. wanna c u bad.
i sms:
i’m really sorry, i didn’t mean to lead you on, you seem like a really nice guy, but i don’t think this is going to work. you’re just too young for me and you don’t spell out your words properly so i don’t really understand what you’re saying a lot of the time.
he says:
Cud hv been urs:
(and attaches this:)
yes, i was shocked too.
end of communication.
28 year old number two contacted me a week later. i ignored him. he was six foot two, i was terrified of what his smses would look like.
BWAAAAA HA HA HA!!!
Jeez I wish I had that problem with the ladies! ;-p
Oh sweet. He lied about his age. He’s only 12.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!
Penis! Dirty! Need to wash eyeballs!
Also, no guy would ever crop a shot of his penis. We’d always make sure to fit the entire length into any picture. (I say this entirely hypothetically.) I think the pic is pretty much what the lad had. That’s a good 7cm there that cud hv been urs.
wahaha deon, that’s such a great guy insight, i love it.
Wow! cool article……
OMG, hahahahahaha. They sure make strange guys in Cape Town… lol