the penis doll.

when i was young(er) our family moved house once.

in the new house somebody found an old box of junk that the previous owners had obviously left behind in the back of a cupboard, it was pretty much a bunch of old crap. a spatula, some old clothes and toys and this old doll, dressed in a dodgy seventies style blue velour pants suit.

nothing much happened for a while after that. most of my siblings had already left home and i was at Camps Bay (i’m so) High School, so i wasn’t really into dolls.

but for some reason we kept ‘Lucy’ around.

then at some point my sisters all went and had a bunch of babies and one day when one of the toddlers was visiting my mom pulled out ‘Lucy’ the dolly for the baby to play with. and that’s when we discovered this:

it turns out creepy Lucy is packing.


a penis and some balls to be precise.

wierd and very creepy. i didn’t know they made anatomically correct dolls. my barbie and kens always had smooth plastic crotches. i’ve never actually come across a doll that was packing like a calvin klein model.

and why a penis and balls on a clearly girl dolly? the people who owned the house before us must have been a bunch of freaks.

my sister’s toddler is going to need some serious therapy one day. there’s no way one can answer all the questions that come out of a toddler who has seen this kind of thing, without a degree.

so i was at my parent’s house this last weekend and i saw that all these years later they still have Lucy, (s)he sits in the guest bedroom, on the bed, in his/her blue velour pants suit, penis, balls and all.
83 year old mr green, their most recent house guest and occupant of the guest room must have some stories to tell back home in knysna.
although if he actually undressed Lucy the dolly at some point during his stay and saw what’s down there, he’s got some bigger issues.
it’s one way to avoid return visits by house guests i suppose.


8 responses to “the penis doll.”

  1. dorothy says:

    OH MY GOD! WHAHAHAHAHAHAHA – that is TOOOOOO funny
    certainly needed that
    wahaha!

  2. Paige says:

    i know how ridiculous?

  3. Anonymous says:

    my guess is someone put a new head on a “boy” doll. I had a friend who had a set just like that with girl and boy… but the boy looked like a boy.

  4. Paige says:

    hey anonymous,
    i think you might be right, it’s really the only thing that makes sense.

  5. . says:

    so fucking weird.

  6. Anonymous says:

    at least he’s intact. 🙂

  7. Mandey Daly says:

    Amazing that he’s intact, wonder what the circ rate was when that doll was produced?

  8. Anonymous says:

    thats disgusting

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