The good, the pretty good…
You should see my column inbox. It’s like a big depository of mad, crazy, wonderful insanity.
Sunday’s column was about the lost art of the pick up line and the mails have been pouring in ever since. I’ve picked out a few that I thought you might enjoy.
The first was astonishing, in that it came from a 91 year old man named John:
Hi Paige,
Really loved your ‘pick up’ lines. Reminded me of my early days – I’m 91 now.
Here from those days are two that sometimes worked; “Excuse me I’m a stranger in town…I wonder if you could direct me to your place” and “You remind me of someone I should know”
Kind Regards,
John
Oh John, my my. I’m not sure which to be more impressed at. The fact that at 91 you’ve got emailing waxed, or the fact that at 91 you’ve still got game!
Except shortly after that mail came through, he sent this one:
Appologies! my wife advises me – for what it’s worth – I am only 81!
as Alison Milton said on twitter:
That’s the difference between men and women. A woman would never add on ten years.
Then there was this mail from a lovely lady named Brigid:
Then there was this mail from a lovely lady named Brigid:
loved your column
did you forget – “may I call you spannerface. Everytime I look at you, my nuts tighten”
Have a friend who’s nick name is still spannerface 20 years after we stopped hanging round in bars looking for Mr Right.
Regards, Brigid.
Spannerface, bwahahaha, I’d never heard that one. Try explaining that nickname to your kids.
But wait, I’ve saved the real fabulous lunacy for last. Swing back by tomorrow to see what Hans sent me.
It’s part funny, part scary but mostly it’s just full on, all out, bat-shit crazy.
I got this one the other day and it pretty much floored me… “Hi, are you looking for a stud? Coz, I have the STD all I need is U!”…. after putting up with 5 minutes of my hysterical laughter he finally shrugged and wandered off!!