Oh Internetweb you are so rad. You’re full of shit that’s crazy and bad. Where else on earth can a person find all sorts of sex toys of the religious kind?
I stumbled across this somewhere online, it’s a crucifix dildo. Somebody is actually making these things. True story.
I suppose for many the orgasm can be a religious experience, so it was really only a matter of time.
Nobody stand too close to me, if this post doesn’t get me struck by lightning, then nothing will.
So then i actually went looking and i found this website, where they sell all sorts of… um… er… let’s just call them ‘religious sexual aids’.
(Look I’m not condoning, producing or flogging this stuff, am simply reporting on it. So don’t shoot the messenger, religious nuts. Seriously, I mean it, please don’t anybody shoot me.)
There’s the Buddha dildo:
According to the website it will: ‘bless all your transcendental moments.’ and ‘…help you reach a true state of nirvana.’
Next we have The Grim Reaper Dildo:
closely followed by The Devil Dildo:
This is made of silicone, so sadly it won’t be able to handle the heat of hell, so you won’t be able to take it with you when you go. But no worries, it should be able to manage the heat of your bedroom just fine.
Ah. The crucifix dildo. I must say, i’m not particularly religious, nor am i Christian, but that sort of, surprisingly, even offends me a little bit.
This on the other hand I find quite funny:
See, it’s a Diving Nun Dildo.
The description on the website says: ‘This pious lady comes complete with silicone wimple and rosary, her head gently bowed…’ bwaahahahahahhahaa!
And here’s the whole range, just waiting to damn you and your dirty mind (and other parts) straight to hell.
Oh wait, we left one of them out:
It’s the Mother Mary Butt Plug. Just $9.99 plus shipping and handling.
Sheesh. We’re all going straight to hell for this one.