A Million Miles from Normal

i found this on the internetweb. i love it. i want to kiss whoever made it on the lips. even if they’re a girl. although not so much if they’re a really ugly girl with a hairy upper lip. i mean i like it a lot, but not that much.

today is a tuesday which is actually more like a saturday. and tomorrow is a wednesday, but more like a monday. if you ask me (which you didn’t, but i’ll tell you anyway, since you’re already here) public holiday or no public holiday, any week with two monday’s in it, is simply cruel and unusual.

monday, historically not my favourite day of the week. if you’re going to stub your toe, or miss a spelling mistake on a printer’s proof, or get crapped on by a seagull, or oversleep, or shag a guy who turns out to be married, or have to copy check a quarterly report, chances are it’s…

there are some very clever people on the interwebby machine. one of them made this. i’m not that clever. all i did was copy and paste it.

so here’s my dilemma. i was just lurking around the book fair today, minding my own business and surreptitiously stalking the ceo of penguin books in the hopes that she might suddenly get the urge to publish me, when i get an sms from my personal trainer, jim. now jim is a super hero. he…

oh shit. i’m having serious blogger’s remorse. was that really my first ever blog? it was so crap. a first entry is supposed to be important, funny, clever and insightful, not corny and cheesy. dammit. it’s horrible being a writer when it comes to stuff like this, and birthday cards. everyone always has such high…

testing… one, two, three, is anybody out there?