if i ever don’t make it as a writer in advertising, or as an author, i think i’m going to try my hand at being the person who writes those security verification things on the computer when you’re trying to comment on someone’s post.
it seems like fun.
they’re only ever two words long, and they have to be cryptic, yet precise. i think it would be a challenge.
also i think the guy who writes them now is just fucking with us, so it’s time to turf him and bring in someone new. someone, say, like me.
here’s one i got on facebook recently:
who the fuck is clive 366? and what’s he got to do with the security verification thingy on my facebook page?
let’s just be honest here, there are some things in life that you know are reeeeaaallly really important, but they’re still kind of aggravating and a pain in the ass, but we can’t really moan about them too much, cos without them we’d all be spambotted to death or murdered in our airplane seat with a pair of nail clippers.
the security verification code is one of those things. together with the guy at the airport who makes you take off your shoes so he can check whether you’ve got a bomb concealed inside the heel. or the lady who digs around in your handbag before she’ll let you into the talk at the design indaba. traffic cops are also in this category, together with those road block guys. all irritating and time consuming but ultimately necesarry.
i’ve been saving some of the more interesting verification codes i’ve had lately, to show you, as proof of my theory that computers are just fucking with us.
‘humbling Apser’ what the hell is that supposed to mean? I’m sure i can do better than that!
here what do you think:
tissue wads.
rectal exam.
spleen tennis.
see, better already.
here’s another one i got recently.
whoa who the fuck does he think he is, calling me a whinger? especially when i am being a whinger on someone elses blog! pratt head!
oooh that could be a good one: pratt head.
and don’t you just hate it when they’re totally illegible, and you try to figure out if it’s an ‘o’ or an ‘a’ but you keep getting it wrong, until eventually you see that it’s actually a ‘g’ and the word is ‘goiter’.
like this one below, what is that?
stream swelthder? stream swelbder? stream swelloder? grrrr who knows? bet the guy who came up with it doesn’t even know, and he’s sitting in his underpants at his computer reading my pathetic attempts at deciphering it, laughing his head off and eating fruit chutney flavoured chips, missing his mouth half the time, so they’re scattered down his fat hairy chest. i bet.
wadding Swiss. what the hell is that supposed to mean?
and my own personal favourite:
yes computer dude, the crap security verifications you write are indeed a cocup!
whoa who the fuck does he think he is, calling me a whinger? especially when i am being a whinger on someone elses blog! pratt head!
wadding Swiss. what the hell is that supposed to mean?
oh yes. I hate those word verification thingy type things.
Ps – I’ve pulled the short straw and am here to tell you that MONDAY ROCKS!!!!!!
Long Live Monday.
have you ever tried the disability function button next to the words that reads them out to you? It sounds like Stephen Hawkings and Lucifer’s lovechild.
spam anayalator
Alwill, that’s hysterical. i’ve never tried that. am hoping i get a security verification notice with this so i can try.