blogging about the people you come across while dating online is a dangerous but enjoyable business.
you don’t want to come across as a heartless, judgemental bitch. i mean seriously, i’m hardly kate moss myself. but on the other hand i really do need to show you some of these people. you need to see them for yourself to believe them.
so before you read this (sheesh, another disclaimer) i need to make it very clear that i’m not judging this guy. i don’t have a problem with him, in fact i think he sounds pretty cool. i totally get that he’s just trying to find a soul mate/quick shag, and kudos to him for that.
BUT that being said, this guy’s profile is hil-fucking-larious and so i have to blog about him. if i didn’t the g-ds of blogging would surely strike me down with writers block, as punishment.
so please don’t call me out in the comments section for being nasty and judgemental, i’m not, i’m just poking fun at someone who just so happens to be funny. ok, disclaimer over.
the design goddess found this guy. she’s on the same dating site as me and we tend to swap war stories on occassion.
please meet Frank (not his real name):
above he says: ‘hey i em looking for a life partner’
‘Frank’ is a very lovely sounding 51 year old man. he is separated, of average height, and has brown eyes. he’s a gemini who is spiritual, but not religeous. he likes long walks on the beach, flirting and women with long hair. he lives in cape town, but something tells me english is most certainly not his first language.
this is why Frank thinks you should get to know him: (I’ll transcribe below letter for letter, incase you didn’t bring your specs)
‘I em living on my one for 9 mnd en i think it’s a weast. i love sports running, cycelling and swem. i olso like cooking, theater, film, coing out for cofee.I have 1 dog (boxer) we walk ofen on the beach.’
indeed Frank, it is a very big weast that you are on your one. weastful, weastful, weastful.
Frank then describes his ideal match thus:
‘loving, caring, possitiv. humor, scharing. lo ve pets, love sports, romentic, love thai food and sushi, love outdoors, sitting home and eate home.’
you go Frank, i em shure there’s a cea fooll of illiterate, non eeengleeesh spikking, sumwat dislexic women out there deeyeng to meat you.