uncharacteristically this post has absolutely nothing to do with penises, vagina’s, dating, breasts or sex. sorry.
if you’re a horny little toad rather scroll down to this post over here about penis dolls.
forget father xmas and carol cd’s set to repeat in shopping malls, this is how i know what time of year it is.
these little fuckers start flying around.
well they’re not really fuckers, of all the bugs they’re my favourite. them and lady birds.
christmas beetles or ‘anoplognathus’ if you want to be posh, come around once a year. now. then they screw each other like mad, lay their eggs in the soil in your garden and die pretty soon after. it takes the larvae a year or so to develop and voila, next year’s little christmas diary reminders are born.
don’t you think they make the most unique noise ever?
the second you hear one flying around you know what time of year it is and you instantly have an empty bank account and put on five kilos, it must be christmas.